I Can Change the Weather


The days I don’t joke about it are the worst ones
People want answers from me, want reasons
As to why I have so much love for everyone around me
But the love I need for myself is something I can’t see
My mirror doesn’t reflect it
What everyone else seems to see so I deflect it
Compliments, and I embrace my insecurities
Transform them into laughter, my own beautiful monstrosities
I can put a smile on your face; I’ll always make you feel better
It doesn’t matter how I feel, cause I can change the weather
For you, I can turn rain into the sun
And even if it’s not for me, I made a difference for someone
I wake up knowing what I’ve done and know that I can change
The world for someone else who may be suffering the same
All they needed was someone who cared enough to make their day
And who am I to think that what I need is more important than them anyway?
If I spend all night awake
Because of the pain that I sometimes cannot shake
I have tomorrow to take someone else’s pain away
I can keep it better; I can harbor what they say
Use it as fuel to filter into the jokes I tell
And if I can do that, even if I’m not feeling well
I feel better because I know I made a difference
Something that used to hurt is no longer a hindrance
And people want to judge me and tell me that I’m wrong
For slipping snide comments about myself in where they don’t belong
I can only apologize and hope that they let it go
Because I’m only at my best today, until I’m here again tomorrow

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