Nostalgia

There is magic about it

The younger years when worry seemed fleeting

And excitement hung in the air 

Anticipation for all the things that have yet to come

Running wild and naked through the dirt

Splashing in pools of black

Horizons disappearing into an infinite scheme of water and sky

The sounds of cheering

The cold lingering at my lips and being pushed away by the warmth of my breath

My ears aching from the sounds of people talking

And the chilling atmosphere that wrapped itself around me 

I miss the smells

Of a hallway freshly coated with wax

The way the classrooms smelled of books

Too many torn and tattered, but too many to be replaced

So the smell remained

Holding within them years of eager hands and youthful faces

How many eyes have scanned those pages and breathed life into them

I miss the anticipation of the bell ringing

Counting down minutes and then seconds until I could burst into the hall

Longing to catch a glimpse of someone I called a friend

Dying to have a conversation about anything but the books

There is a way that my heart aches for the spirit of a child

Wishing there was a way to visit the past

To step back into the shoes I walked in then

No fear, no hurry, living in moments that often pass us by

Me and my friends

We didn't know what we had then

I grew up in a high school

My curls bounced at my shoulders from year to year

Poking my head into every classroom

Saying hello to every teacher

And as much as they helped raise me

I helped raise them

I see that now

My fire and the sound of my laughter

Echoed in time from first grade to last

It all seemed to go by so fast

Time only stands still now in the photographs

Friends I've lost, teachers have left, coaches have moved on

Even the building looks different now

Better and yet betraying somehow

The memory of what it was to me

Metal bleachers brown and wary

From stomping feet and hopeful fans

Who came week in and week out to catch a glimpse of me

I wore my heart thin in every corner of that school

I gave it all of me, all that I had to give then

I took pride in my community, I took pride in my family

I took pride in the way that we showed our loyalty

To the house that built me

To the house that I built

That will always feel the most like home

Even long after I have gone

I left my mark and it left its mark on me

There is an ache that I feel that is particular only to that place 

Unique and haunting, but happy and wonderful too

Reflecting back will always bring a welcome dichotomy

Of joy and loss

Of a road that I once walked, but can never walk again

And that's okay, that it had to end

But some days I miss it so

The never know kind of feeling

Of what the future holds

Of dreaming and wandering

I guess I can hold onto some of those things

As September rolls around each year

I remind myself of that

I am still a dreamer of the future

And I can't wait to begin