Insecurity

My insecurities are wolves
They circle me
Constantly
Occasionally lurching out to take a piece
But never breaking from the pack
My fear is but a snack
On which they feed
And no matter the deed
I wish to achieve
Whether shallow or steep
There they are in the shadows, watching me
With hungry eyes and empty stomachs
They ravage my mind with sticks
And stones
These insecurities swallow me when I’m alone
They rip and tear, they bully and beat
They kick me when I’m down, they know when I am weak
They stand proudly with my heart at their feet
And they’ll sink their unforgiving teeth
Into flesh and souls
Taking their tolls
Until my pain manifests on me physically
Whether I carve up my skin
Like an October pumpkin
Or I eat all the food that I can manage
Until my skin bends and stretches into something I can’t bandage
With gauze or an oversized t-shirt
Until I flirt
With my demons out loud-for everyone to see
But I’m afraid of what they’ll think of me.
Who I show you is not me.
It’s all of my insecurities.

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